Are You Ribbon Me?

Recently I was on the bus and noticed three separate women, with three different colored ribbons on. I had, or have, no doubt that these women are as committed to these charities/ issues as any human being can be. However, curiosity got the best of me. So I wrote down the colors and decided to look up what each ribbon meant. 

I have to tell you I was stunned. 

I thought, perhaps - maybe, there could not be more than 12 ribbon colors, for there are only 12 months and there are usually "Awareness" months to correspond with each ribbon.

Stupid me!

There are actually, according to THIS website, 73 different ribbon colors, and another 3 pending ribbons.

Now, I am no genius, but my son's big ass box of crayons has only 64 colors. We color all the time and in that mix of 64, there are at least 15-20 that we have never found useful.

So what the deal? the deal is a bunch of these ribbons are just bullcrap!

You didn't think I was not going to name names did you?

ROLL CALL (noting that some colors have multiple meaning, here we go):

Orange = feral cats, self-injury (these seem to me to be related)

Yellow = boycott Aruba (for Natalie)

Blue = water quality (does this include bottled)

Purple = children left unattended in cars

White = innocence (this needs a ribbon?), survivors (does not state of what?)

Black = Amish support and Accidents (does not state what type)

Burgundy = cesarean sections, headaches & migraines

Pink = nursing mothers (or sufferers of big tit w/ long, chewed nipple sightings)

Emerald Green = homeopathy awareness (ribbon should be made w/ green tea)

Silver = stalking (so they can spot you in a crowd, I guess)

Red, White & Blue = fireworks safety (make sure ribbon is non-flammable)

Purple and Black = paranormal awareness (though invisible makes more sense to me)

Orange & Green = ritual abuse (do they mean religious) 

There are others, but some things just aren't that funny.

Remember, MOST colors have multiple meanings, so please be sensitive to your co-workers.